As someone with high functioning ADHD, I think weed makes life taste like life again, and I’m trying to be honest about that

I don’t know exactly how to explain this without sounding like I’m either defending weed too much or being dramatic about it, but I’ll try.

I use cannabis in a pretty stable way. Usually once at night during weekdays, sometimes twice a day on weekends. It’s not an all-day thing, and my dose is not really going up. I can skip it. I don’t get angry, I don’t stop sleeping, I don’t feel like I’m physically falling apart.

But sober life gets… flat. Not always, not in every possible way, but a lot.

It’s like eating food without lemon, without pepper, without sauce. You can eat it. It’s food. You are not dying. But something is missing and your brain knows it.

I have ADHD, and I had anhedonia before cannabis was ever part of my life, so I don’t feel like weed created the problem. It feels more like weed found the problem and said “ok, I can put color here for a while.”

Music gets deeper. Shows get warmer. My cats feel even more comforting. Little rituals feel like rituals, not just random things I do to survive the evening. The world gets more magnetized, if that makes sense. Like things finally have texture again.

And that’s exactly why I’m trying to be careful.

Because it doesn’t feel chaotic. It doesn’t feel like “oh no, my life is ruined by weed.” It feels functional. Almost too functional. Like a very reliable emotional seasoning.

I still have things that give me brightness without cannabis: music, my cats, some shows, gaming sometimes. So it’s not like cannabis is the only source of joy. But it definitely makes joy louder. It makes everything more saturated.

So I guess I’m asking about this middle place. Not rock bottom, not “weed is my personality”, not denial either.

Has anyone here dealt with this kind of psychological dependence where the issue is not escalating use, but the fear that sober life feels under-seasoned?